When we talk about gender identity, the conversation often focuses on dysphoria – the discomfort or distress that can come from a mismatch between your gender identity and the way you’re perceived or treated. But there’s another side to the story: gender euphoria.

Gender euphoria is that deep, affirming joy you feel when your gender expression, identity, or body feels right. It’s an experience of alignment – where who you are on the inside meets how you see yourself, or how others see you, on the outside. And for many trans and non-binary people, it’s a vital part of understanding and affirming our gender.

My First Memory of Gender Euphoria

One of my earliest memories of gender euphoria happened when I was little. I was wearing a fairy dress over my clothes, with a Batman cowl, cape, and gloves. It was equal parts scary and exciting – a strong burst of joy in my chest, like a secret connection to myself.

I didn’t know I was trans at the time, and it would take years to figure that out. But looking back, that moment (and the photograph I still have of it) reminds me that this joy has always been a part of me.

For anyone who didn’t know they were trans or non-binary from a young age, it’s easy to assume you never experienced gender euphoria back then. But sometimes those little sparks of joy were there – we just didn’t have the words yet.

How Gender Euphoria Feels Day-to-Day

For me now, gender euphoria can show up anywhere. It might be when I catch my reflection and think, Yes. That’s me. Or when someone uses the right name or pronouns and it hits me in a way that feels warm and electric.

Sometimes it’s subtle, like a quiet hum of rightness in my chest. Other times it’s loud and joyful – like putting on a favourite outfit, looking in the mirror, and thinking, Damn, I look great.

Euphoria isn’t reserved for special occasions, either. I’ve felt it while dressed to the nines in a waistcoat and skirt heading to the theatre, but also in a hoodie and three-day-old jeans. It’s about the feeling of being yourself – not the clothes themselves.

A Turning Point in My Journey

For years, I was living comfortably as non-binary and already familiar with gender euphoria. But starting testosterone (T) was a huge turning point.

Not everyone needs or wants medical transition to feel affirmed, but for me, growing facial hair – especially sideburns – brought a powerful sense of alignment. It’s hard to describe without repeating myself, but it felt like more and more pieces of the puzzle were clicking into place.

Joy in Contrast to Confusion

These moments of euphoria stand out against the harder parts of my gender journey. Like many people, I spent a long time feeling something was “off” but not knowing what it was. I tried things that didn’t fit. I second-guessed myself. And in those moments, it was easy to forget the joy.

When we’re struggling, our brains tend to hold onto the negative experiences more than the positive ones. That’s why I’ve kept photos of my most affirming moments – my first binder, cool outfits, haircuts, makeup beards, my first facial hair. Looking back on them is a reminder that joy is real and worth holding onto.

If You Haven’t Felt Gender Euphoria Yet

If you haven’t felt this yet – or you’re not sure you have – know that you’re not alone. At the start of my own self-discovery, I didn’t think I had either.

Euphoria doesn’t always look like a cinematic, life-changing moment. Sometimes it’s small: feeling happy when hearing certain pronouns, feeling right in a certain piece of clothing, or smiling unexpectedly when you catch your reflection. And if that hasn’t happened yet, it can. Joy will come.

Why Talking About Euphoria Matters

We need to talk about gender euphoria just as much as we talk about challenges like dysphoria.

Our gender journeys aren’t only about overcoming pain – they’re about chasing joy, self-love, and connection. They’re about thinking you look epic, sounding like yourself, or being in a room of people who see and accept you. These are the moments we’re aiming for when we explore and discover our identities.

If I could talk to my younger self in those moments of early euphoria, I’d say: This is what it’s all for. Remember this. Chase this feeling. Following joy will lead you to more.